Should You Pursue an Autism/ADHD Diagnosis for Your Child?
Today, I’m going to attempt to cram a many-years-long thought process into one blog post.
Read along? 😅
I want to explore something I’ve been mulling over for a long time: the pros and cons—along with a bit of existential musing—of pursuing an Autism and/or ADHD diagnosis for your child.
And I’ll share something exciting at the end — neuroaffirming assessments!
In an Ideal World...
We wouldn’t need diagnoses.
If you’ve worked with me before, you’ve likely heard my idealistic rant about the diagnostic process.
The short version?
Autism and ADHD are simply different operating systems. Not disorders. Not collections of deficits.
Just different ways of being in the world—ways that often require different supports.
If we had a village supporting us…
If our kids were educated in inclusive, developmentally-appropriate ways…
And if teachers had the resources they needed…
Then we wouldn’t need labels like “Autism” and “ADHD” to convince others our kids deserve support.
A dreamy thought, right?
But unfortunately that (generally) is not the world we live in.
When a Diagnosis Might Not Be Necessary
Sometimes, a child already has access to what they need, without having to pursue a formal diagnosis.
If this is your situation, a diagnosis may not be necessary—at least not right now.
It might look like:
A school that provides accommodations without requiring a formal designation
Family and friends who trust your non-traditional parenting approaches
Financial means to access supports like OT, speech, parent consultation, play therapy, and respite
A team of medical professionals who believe and support you
A true village that uplifts you and offers hands-on help
In my daydreams, I picture a commune-like situation…
Kids running wild and free, connected to nature, surrounded by non-judgmental grownups who share the load and have each other’s backs.
(Still holding out hope for this version of society...sigh)
But the Reality for Most Families Is...
...a lot messier. Here’s what I hear far more often:
School staff using strategies that escalate behaviors—not because they’re uncaring, but because they’re overwhelmed and under-resourced
Relatives insisting that you “just need to hold firmer boundaries” or “try ____________” (when you’ve tried literally everything)
“Self-care” being completely inaccessible because you don’t have the time, money, or help
Doctors brushing you off because your child doesn’t line up trains or avoid eye contact
Longing for a community that gets it but not knowing where to find one
Being gaslit, judged, or stared at every time you leave the house
Wearing every single hat, all the time, and barely holding it together
This is why (even though I know diagnoses are just names made up by privileged white men and codified in a pathologizing manual)...
I’m on Team Diagnosis.
Because calling it Autism is better than calling it overreacting.
Calling it ADHD is better than calling it lazy.
And calling it PDA is better than calling it willfully non-compliant.
What a Diagnosis Can Offer
A diagnosis can provide access to:
School-based accommodations (IEPs/IPPs)
Funding/financial help - e.g., Autism Funding Unit if BC (AFU), Disability Tax Credit (DTC)
Community programs
Increased understanding from educators, medical professionals, and family members
A sense of validation (you’re not making it up and your child isn’t broken)
Self-compassion and self-understanding. For example, intead of your child internalizing negative comments, they can learn what’s behind their challenges.
I’ve walked through the diagnostic process multiple times with my own family, and I don’t regret it—despite the imperfections.
But I’ll be honest: the traditional assessment experience felt... clinical (ick).
Cold, medical, full of jargon, and completely devoid of reassurance. No one told me I was doing a good job. No one told me my kid would be okay.
And that’s not what I want for anyone.
That’s Why I Created Something Different
I've dreamed for a long time of offering an assessment experience that’s affirming and human.
One that sees the whole child—and the whole parent.
And... 🎉 it’s happening! 🎉
I’ve welcomed a new team member: Ryan, a Registered Provisional Psychologist who’s just as passionate about neuroaffirming care as I am.
He offers Autism, ADHD, and Psychoeducational assessments for kids, youth, and adults.
Our neuroaffirming assessments are designed especially for folks of all ages who are often dismissed.
Those who are:
High-masking
PDA (Pathological/Protective Demand Avoidance)
Girls/women
Gender-diverse youth and adults
“Atypically” presenting
“Internalizers” (keep their traits hidden)
We see you. We believe you.
Curious About an Assessment?
If you’re on the fence about pursuing a diagnosis for your kid—but would be open to it if the process felt supportive, uplifting, and helpful—check out our new assessment pages for kids/youth and adults.
And if you’re feeling ready (or almost ready), join the waitlist here.
There’s no commitment—it just saves your spot in queue 😊
Live outside of Calgary? We’re also exploring travel and accommodation options to make this process as smooth as possible. (Currently, we can only assess Canadian clients.)
If you have any questions at all, don’t be shy—reach out! I’m always happy to chat (kerry@kerryschroeder.ca)
Take care,
Kerry
